Recently, there has been a major push to encourage the settlement and development of the Empire’s frontier. As part of this initiative, the PDB has been making additional parcels of land accessible to the public for purchase. It is believed by policymakers that as sectors become more developed, they likewise become more secure. Statistics from recent studies show that it is significantly harder for outlaws and Vanduul raiding parties to gain purchase in UEE-controlled systems when there are settlers and companies with vested interests in ensuring the protection of that territory. Combine this with Consolidated Outland’s recent introduction of a self-contained colonization platform, and many are expecting to see a new golden age of land development in the second half of the 30th century.
“it’s a lore post! it’s a lore post!!”, i continue to insist as i slowly watch evocati leaks and follow the lead up to the holiday sale
VictorianQueerLit
Hmm, seems like the obsession with Derek and Line of Defense has an almost superstitious effect on the faithful.
Their behaviour is governed by a simple rule, but like single-celled lifeforms and early computer programs, the interaction of large numbers of iterations of a simple rule can produce the illusion of complexity.
Essentially, there are two categories in a serious cultist’s mind. GOOD and BAD. Star Citizen is GOOD. Derek Smart is BAD. These two categories are ironclad and never the twain shall meet.
The word “scam” is a BAD thing. But saying “Star Citizen is a scam” makes the cultist lock up; Star Citizen can only be GOOD. Things of the Smart are BAD, therefore anything BAD must be associated with Derek Smart even if CIG are doing it. Otherwise the cultist’s brain throws an exception and that hurts.
So Derek must be scamming, because scamming is in the BAD category and Derek is in the BAD category. So the cultist shouts as loudly and as often as possible that Derek is the real scammer because otherwise the cognitive dissonance hurts too much. The most flimsy and ridiculous evidence is marshalled to support this, and other cultists flock to agree because that way they can reassure one another that the rightful order is being upheld. This pattern extends to all possible BAD concepts, like refunds and awkward questions and filthy leavers. It’s why the cultists are so obsessed with saying that refunds are actually people scamming CIG. They can understand refunds are BAD and scams are BAD and Derek is BAD, and all these concepts blend together because their critical thinking skills have atrophied so badly they genuinely can’t tell the difference anymore. Someone who wants a refund instantly goes into the BAD category and must be a scammer and a goon and a shill and a Derek alt and a spy for Big Publishing and probably a terrorist and a communist too. That’s why you get these ridiculous frothing accusations aimed at Derek that read like the citizen has just banged their keyboard and written down every possible bad thing they could come up with. They genuinely have just written down a list of evil-sounding concepts, and in their minds Derek is all of them at once.
This goes the other way as well; it fuels the dreams. Star Citizen is GOOD, and all the ideas of GOOD in the cultist’s head get mixed up with it and become the huge dreaming memeplex we’re so familiar with. 1000-player dogfights, handheld cargo, massive capital ship battles and total physical realism are GOOD so SC must have them because it too is GOOD and therefore all GOOD things at once.
I honestly think if Derek was struck by a bolt of inspiration and coded an amazing 1000-player capital ship battles patch for Line of Defence , the cultists would actually start claiming it was really in Star Citizen or Derek had somehow stolen CIG’s codebase, just to avoid having to think Derek can do a thing that fell into the GOOD category.
Not every Star Citizen has fallen this far, but the really nasty ones have.
You can model this thread along these lines too, to be honest. Our attitude to Sandi and Chris in particular.
I genuinely believe that if stressed hard enough, you could get a really-far-gone shitizen to claim that a particularly embarrassing piece of Star Citizen footage is actually from Line of Defence.
You can model this thread along these lines too, to be honest. Our attitude to Sandi and Chris in particular.
Right cause we don’t have any compelling evidence whatsoever that Sandi and Chris suck shit.
Regardless of the reason underlying CIG’s failure to fill these posts, they are competing for talent like everyone else and the project is simply not attracting any. Additionally they have failed to retain the talent that they did have.
In case anyone hasn’t worked it out, that job is to create promotional material for in-game items - “Help develop brands within the Star Citizen universe, create logos and visual styles that reinforce the game Lore”. The vacancy for that post appears right at the same time CIG announce they will start selling plots of land.
It’s a giant scam, selling in-game items without a game and without communicating mechanics attached to those items by way of a spec or a plan or a description. It’s a total fucking scam from back to front.
Another day, another red X. Chris looks at the calendar on his wall and counts the ever decreasing number of days he has left until a date circled in red. A date that refuses to be delayed by any amount of bugs, blockers, tasks, or refactors.
Too few days left, he thinks. Why won’t they just give me a little extra time, why won’t they just listen to reason, why won’t they just see what I’m trying to do here.
But The Bank will not budge.
With a sigh, he gets up and walks over to a glass box mounted to the wall, and whispers to himself “I guess this is the emergency,” before breaking the glass. He pulls out an envelope, cutting his finger on a shard as he does so.
He opens the envelope and unfolds its contents, and a drop of blood falls onto the paper. For a moment he looks at the drop, and thinks how much he has sacrificed. But it doesn’t matter now, for this, this is the jpeg that will save the dream.
BoredGamer gets a good 25-30k views on his daily videos which are just “And you will be able to do this, and then that, and then this, and you will be able to do this cool thing too” over and over. His audience seems to absolutely adore the stream of consciousness dream diarrhoea.
Someone on here said he is the most credulous man to have ever lived, and that may be the case, but he might be just very clever instead, having found a quick and easy way to make reliable money (plus patreon) simply by verbalising digital space game possibilities for ten minutes every day.
Hi Cloud Imperium Games. It’s apparent than in desperation for more cash, you’ve been trawling the SA forums for any ideas that will turn a commando upside down and shake the pennies out of their pockets. The selling land thing is fucking great, and I can’t wait to see this hilarity play out.
I have some other ideas that are guaranteed to be winners and bring you in at least hundreds of dollars and I can’t wait for you to rip them off:
Robot butlers: When there’s just not enough hours in the day to do space laundry or make space food, a robot butler will come in very handy.
Buy your way into space government: Why be a citizen when you could be a senator? While I’m sure there are already plans to allow citizens to play politics in your game, why not sell off an instant political office so a player can start out with a guaranteed spot in government? A small pledge makes you a senator, a large pledge makes you a planetary governor, and for an extra large fee, you can make your position a lifetime term! Exciting!
Toilet bowl cleaners: We all love taking space shits, but some of us spend too much time cleaning our space latrines. For a small wad of cash, you can get a toilet bowl disc that you can drop straight into the tank, making it so much easier.
Porsches: Not space Porsches, but actual Porsches that commandos can drive on the way to their space job. Who needs a pleb buggy when you can drive to the office in style? They’ll be very expensive, but you already know that.
Wankpod Porn: Several nice packages of in-game smut for when you just gotta rub one out before saving the galaxy. Many different varieties to choose from, but the high end package will be nude videos and pics of Chris Roberts. Your fans will make you millions.
Dorka Smerk voodoo doll: Something for your commandos to vent their frustrations out on while they’re waiting for your dreams to become reality. In no way shape or form similar to any real game developers.
Planets: Why buy land when you can have your own planet? As we all know, planets are easy. Randomize a seed and just flip the procedural switch and you’re good to go. For a princely sum, commandos can outright have their own unique planet to rule with an iron fist.
Goon Detector: When the game finally comes out, all of the goons that haven’t died of old age will do what goons do. Since you already have in-depth profiles on everyone including goon tags and snowflake tags, you’ll know which players are goons, but the commandos won’t! Sell them a goon detector that they can carry around so they can run crying from the first goon that comes close to them. Rip off the design from the “Aliens” motion tracker, that shouldn’t be too hard.
Custom lines in Squadron 42: Who wouldn’t love to hear Admiral Bishop give his stirring speech but also mention that Commando xxL3aveRoyMoor3Alon3xx is the best pilot in the galaxy? Or Old Man Hamill saying to his friends that you’re the most handsome and virile man who ever lived? Or have Cara “Web” Webster calling you by name and offering to give you a handy? Dreams like this and more are worth a lot to lonely shut-in nerds, and they’ll pay bank for them.
An in-game copy of Star Citizen and Squadron 42: If you could sell a game twice, why wouldn’t you? For a real challenge, players can buy a copy of Star Citizen for their commando to play on their space chariot while playing Star Citizen! They can even buy all the packages all over again! You can also sell an optional Kevlar case for them to put their computer in so it doesn’t kill anyone when it explodes.
Please use these ideas to keep the funding rolling so that the insanity never stops.
I have something that is apparently super rare for trade.
My older sister used to work in the industry so I had like, a million Beanie Babies. They are all in storage now, but she gave me one that she told me to keep safe because it was signed. There were only 200 some odd made, and have apparently sold on ebay for over $7,000.
At this point, as cool as it is to have a rare collectible, it has just been sitting on my dresser in it’s protective case for like, 15 years, so I would rather have some cool ships.
If anyone is interested or wants pics shoot me an offer. I will ONLY do this as an in person trade in the central valley area of CA.
It has the hard plastic tag protector on it, has never been removed, it also has been sealed in a hard plastic Ty show case for the last 15 years. Mint condition.
The ships I am most interested in are: Carrack Pheonix Avenger Super Hornet 890 Idirs Retaliator
Would also be open to cash offer.
Derek Smart
No Star Citizen anniversary live stream this year. Obviously because the much touted, one year late, 3.0 build is completely & flat-out BROKEN; and they simply can’t play/show it live.
Don’t worry though, that’s not going to affect the obligatory end of year JPEG ship sale cash grab.
Seeing as they are most definitely engaging in a Ponzi-like scheme, if you put in for your refund now, they will have money next month to give you. New sales, fund old sales refunds.
Sarsapariller
MoMA
Stfu you insufferable man-baby. This time last year, you called that 3.0 wasn’t even happening. No author on the face of this planet could even come close to changing the narrative more times than you have since THE JULY BLOGGGGGGgGGGGggggg.
Are you referring to this time last year when they said it was coming out in December and Derek (and the rest of us) said it wasn’t?
Finally, Star Citizen Alpha 3.0 is getting closer to a PTU release. We would love for you to help with testing. If you’re interested, keep an eye out for an email inviting you to join us. We are expecting to go to PTU before your next concierge newsletter on December 20th.
Last time Chris floated the Dec 19th release was in 2016
